Sunday, March 28, 2010

"I'm gonna write you a letter."

I stole that title from Mike's parents.  When they are not pleased with each other, this phrase always makes an appearance and I love it. 
Completely unrelated to that story is this:
Today we received this letter in the mail -
Very official looking and scary.

This lovely letter is from Metro Government of Nashville and Davidson County, Department of Codes Administration.  Great.
We have been "notified as owner" of our house of the following violations:
Section 16.24.330 - Accessory Structures: All accesory structures, including detached garages, fences, and walls, shall be maintained structurally sound, in good repair, and in an otherwise safe, clean and sanitary condition.
Section  16.24.330 - Open Storage: It is inlawful to store in the open area of tha yard or structure, trash, rubbish, furniture, appliances, automobile parts, including dead trees, weeds and garbage, etc (Junk, Trash, and Debris).
That is a verbatim quote of the code law from the letter. 
And what exactly are they talking about, you ask.  It's this:

Our delapidated carport.

Yes, it looks gross.  Yes, there is a fridge, a window, a shopping cart, a trash can full of metal, and about 1000 square feet of tile in there.  I know, Metro, I know, I HATE it too.
But for the love of the Golden Cow, today is the first nice day we've had since we moved into this place.  I cannot believe that you honestly think we should have been out there in 12 degree weather and 6 inches of snow taking care of this.  Nevermind the fact that a whole lot of that "junk, trash, and debris" was left by the previous owners.  Thanks.
Here's another doozy of a quote for you:
Therefore, you are to have the violation or cause removed and/or corrected before April 26, 2010.
Removed? Right, b/c we have about $8k lying around just burning a hole in our bank accounts for this very purpose. 
And the deadline...seriously?  Sorry but we're a little busy trying to work on the inside of the house Where We LIVE.  And plan a wedding.  And work full time jobs. 

So Thank You Metro Nashville Codes Department.  I'm gonna write you a letter.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Mary Jane, Marchgiving, and our Doggie Disaster Weekend

We'll start at the beginning. 
Our plan this weekend was to take the pups to the vet get Mary Jane's "good leg" checked out, get their shots, have Marchgiving at the Vecchiomisterton household, and paint the 2nd living room.  That was the plan.
Saturday morning:  We get up have some coffee and start getting ready to head to the vet.  I'm putting clothes on and Matt lets the dogs out.  I hear one of them screaming.  Not howling at a squirrrel as usual but screaming in pain.  Of course, it's Mary Jane.  The genius was chasing a squirrel and ran head on into a stump that is as big as she is....And it begins.
We head to the vet hoping to get in early.  We get in and discover that her shoulder is swollen (from running into the stump), her "good leg" probably has a partially torn ACL, and they both get all their annual and every 3 year shots.  They weren't happy campers.
Saturday afernoon:  Matt primes and paints the trim of the 2nd living room.  While I head to Bellevue to discuss wedding centerpieces and to the grocery then prep for Marchgiving.
Saturday night:  Marchgiving goes off without a hitch.  Good food, good drink, nothing was set on fire - Success! 
A picture from last year since I forgot my camera this year. Fail.

We get home, let the pups out, and get ready for bed, it's about 230 am.  Matt proceeds to pass out and I keep hearing puppy collars rattle.  I get up to find Mary Jane's face swollen so bad that her eyes are barely open and she keeps shaking her head.  Cue prompt freak out:
"Oh my God, oh my God, Matt....MATT - look at Mary Jane!"
Frantic calls to the emergency vet and a mad search for some Benadryl ensue.  So began one sleepless night on the couch....
Sunday morning: MJ is in a Benadryl induced coma, Doobie is being Doobie, and we paint the walls of the 2nd living.  Matt says, "Does it look like Doobie's face is swelling?"  Shit.  Yes, it does.  His ears are burning up and he's shaking his head like crazy.  Cue Doobie's Benadryl induced coma and 4th call to the emergency vet. 
Sunday evening:  MJ's stomach is upseat, meaning I've cleaned up her stomach contents 4 times today (I'll spare you the visual), and Doobie is running around like he's on crack trying to make his paws stop itching.
The only thing we can figure is the vaccines are causing this allergic reaction.  Our pups are miserable, we feel helpless and the new vet will be getting a phone call in the morning.
ANOTHER Benadryl coma is headed their way.

The good news is we have a painted 2nd living room and we have enough Marchgiving leftovers to last a week.
I'm scared to even ask the question....is there anything else, seriously??